Falastine is recent graduate of the Department of English Literature at An Najah University in Nablus, West Bank.

Homie Home
Coexistence
I'm Blind
Falling Apart
Do We Always Have to Fall?
Regression
Perfection
I'm Letting Go
Bridge of Light
Suddenly
A Mirror that Reflects Me Not
I Wish
Silence
Prayers of a Candle
Just Leaves
A Scratch
A Margin for a Nomad
Sing me an Arabian Night
There...
Identity...
On My Way to Nowhere...
The Star Needs to Fall...
Because There is No End...
Let Go
What is Left

Homie Home

I came with many questions
And ended up negotiating my
Right to write few words.
My way is hideous, I know
My life is a confusion between
The Yes and the NO.
But today I know how death smells like
How burned flesh smells like
And I realized
That my body is addicted to splinters
That the world is as plain
Still and empty
As the moment of creation

My stifled voice is a black shadow
That shall haunt the world
And teach humanity how to speak
Speechless as I am
Hungry
Angry
Naked
Abandoned as I am
I don't have a story
No… don't ask me
Yes!! I have answers
But they simply won't suit your emptiness
They are not for your  short tagged questions.

Let's play a game the little kids
Murdered in Gaza used to play
"homie home"
Let's pretend that our tent is our home
Our home
Let us pretend that our hearts are not broken
Just like our broken mosques
"homie home"

Coexistence

People seem to have an answer
For every question I have
They know where they will end up
In Paradise or hell
And they know the entire story
But I don't
And nothing can fulfill my strive for eternity
But the uncertain expansion of the universe.

I have a limited perspective
I know how the sky looks like every night
I know how I came wandering along the path
Whirling around my voice
Drunk
        So drunk
                   Too drunk
To thinking that I can
Feed my thirst that
Swallowed my hunger
And left the path without the Sufi.

I still have something to believe in
My broken imagination
My broken vows
My broken Myth
And I know I'm not being enough
I know I have to coexist with emptiness
So they can hear what I have to say
I am not the living Buddha
Not the salt of this earth
Nothing is holy for me
Except the moment when
I yell at the universe
And hear nothing back but
An old man whispering
Complaining.

I'm Blind

I’m walking
Paralyzed, but still walking
The same broken road.
I’ve been there
I know those two mountains
Blind, but still I know those two mountains
Sipping their darkness
Their bitterness, loneliness
Dead hopes and hardly beating dreams.

I am not seducing memories
Not waking up the distant passions
But I’m Cinderella
I don’t want what I want
I drink misery cooled with pain
Climb the stairs
And lose my sense of responsibility
On the forbidden steps
Pretending that nothing happened
I drink my black coffee
So convinced
It won’t change me into a ghost
So convinced
I don’t like it
So drinking it
With so much waiting.

I’m blind
I’m the war settled between
Words and the shattered sidewalks
The world that is so crowded
So warm
So destroyed
So old
Like humanity that failed to know
How it feels like to be homeless
Sleep hungry covered with
Ruminated newspapers
And wake up in the early morning
To clean up the streets
So I can walk luxuriously
Wearing my high heels
Or drive my way
To my warm sweet-smelling haven
And feel sorry
Feel angry
For those who can’t afford
Sleeping with something
In their outworn stomachs
Or those who sneak out of schools
To sell tissues by the traffic lights
So I can dry my tears
And soothe my broken heart
For losing my holy-shit-shopping list.

I’m blind
I’m heavy
Like those blocks making that huge wall
I’m hollow… I’m hollow
Like those bullets directed
To the chests of broken children
I’m a shadow
Like this land
Like this Earth
Like humanity – I’m blind.

Falling Apart

A curse and a bless
I am both.
Let me sip my tea
I’m lost among the pictures
Can’t find my way out to my shell
Why should I care
When I hardly can recognize my silence?

Autumn is back
Stirring thoughts on my palm
Haunting my words with words
And I’m becoming yellow
Having the color of our dreams all over me.
Will you ever come back?
Will I ever go away?
I’ll wait
Till the threads of my shawl fall apart.

Through this wild evening
I’ll pave my way to regression.
Mother of the eyes
Read your fortune in my words
And become the prophecy.
Be the taste of a moment holding certitude.
Stay!
The world is too stable for us to stand
Stay, and take me back
To taste the bitterness of time’s lips
What I can’t possess
The will of a candle’s flame
To survive for seconds.

Do We Always Have to Fall?

Remind me of my everyday question
My ship that’s trapped in the Trojan bay
What are your words looking for within me?
Remind me, so I don’t forget
What I’ve never remembered
The violets that someday
Grew on your divine palms
Remind me of my name
I don’t want to remember
The words that haunted my empty skull
And survived the day.

Haunt me
Reach my lips and let go of kisses
There is so much ambiguity in the light
And more to rise after the sun.
I miss the morning in your smiles
The dawn that never tasted the wine of passions
The luxury of stepping beyond the names
And knowing when we’ve once passed away
Do we always have to fall?
I’ll hold us here and there
Remind me
I am Not.

Throw the shadow of the place
And haunt me
I’m falling into my name
Captive of what I’m not
A sensation…
Who am I?
A butterfly made of stones and roses
Consumed by words…
Have mercy on those
Who never knew that skies existed.

I’ve learned to be a witness
Don’t push me into words
“Why?!!”
Because I’m the moment born in your eyes
The obstinate love
Beating your whisper
I am your whimper...

Regression

I walked through a wall
And crossed a continent with a straw
In a moment
There is no time
No creation
No crossroads
There is only a heap of voiceless cries
And faithless submissions
Of a buried man
Who’s walking down the street.

The river you are sitting by
Dangling your regression in its waters
Is indeed dry!
So kiss the moment goodbye
And follow the steps of the buried man
Down the street
Hurry up son of nothing
Lucifer is occupying your palace
There in the others kingdom
Hurry up
You don’t want to miss the show
You don’t want to miss the moment
That’s stretched between
A judgment and a rope of fire.
You don’t want to miss the breeze
That breaks through the stones
And your over lapsed desire.

Perfection

Between the Question and the Perfection
Falls the desire
Falls the empire
And rises the passion
For the overwhelming answers
Of the ever unforgettable questions.

Between the question and the perfection
Rises the moment of the no time
And the fires of Prometheus
Become a crime!
Darkness was meant
To be a bliss
And perfection was meant to be
The world where mind cannot confess!

And YES
I have a word
I have a mission
I have a confession
And so many questions.
YES I don’t believe
And that is the secret

I'm Letting Go

While I’m breaking the sun to rise
Instead of waiting for the nothing to become
I’m letting go
Leaving behind all the paths
That led to the same old mansion
I’m leaving all the words
To go back to it’s silence
And the sweet dreams
To go back home
And sleep
Really deep.

I’m letting go
For my flowers didn’t yet bloom
And the void is calling
In that empty room
I’m leaving all the connections
Letting go all the bonds of light
Going where nobody ended
Overcoming my delight.

I’ll carry my brush
And paint endless way
Reaching the edges of the unlimited
Yes, I’ll let go
My worlds need a new sun
Needs a new desk
A new cave
A new star
A new rainbow
And YES, I’ll let go.

Bridge of Light

I’m standing on the edge
Of you my blessed bridge
Waiting for a shadow
A light
A bless
To come over the dust of years.

My blessed bridge
Fill in the gap of fears
Ride over the river of tears
And plant me oaks and willows
A tree knows not my sorrow
A tree knows not me.

Oh my blessed bridge
In the depth of your soul
I whispered me
In the depth of you
I gave up what I know
And what I don’t.

Don’t call me divine bridge
I know all the paths leading to the unexpected
I know you
I know every face
All the names
All the games
I have every grace
But I know not me
I have not me
I met not me.

There at the other edge of the unknown
Lies my heart
There is me.

Suddenly

When I look at the world that stands behind the glass
I realize how low my voice among the chaos
And suddenly choose to be
The woman who live inside of me
The woman who hugs the start
Sleeps over a night of roses
To welcome the dawn in my heart.

Suddenly I choose to live in silence
Suddenly I quit all the arguments
Suddenly I no more ask many questions
I no more read the old newspapers
I’m the child that grows in me
So suddenly.

A Mirror that Reflects Me Not

A mirror that reflects me not
Behind the walls
Behind the maps
Behind the knots
A mirror reflects an angel
A fire place
A wooden hut
Alas, it reflects me not.

A mirror on my wall
On my pillow
In the air and everywhere
Reflects someone I used to know
Someone I've lost long ago
A face no one admits it ever existed.

The mirror was broken
But still
It reflects a child on the cross
A path to the sun
A wind to the east
A future on the run
But still
It reflects me not

I Wish

I wish I can call you with the names I love
Whisper in your ears the words of destiny
I wish
The sacred will waste the walls of ice between
And paradise becomes again ever green.

I wish I had more moons to light the nights
More stars to fall with
More patience to kiss the dawn goodbye
More roses around the room to smell
I wish I heard the sound of that vague bell
I wish there was any language or words to tell
I wish

Silence

When silence plays the sacred music
And infinite time become one hour
I realize that nothingness is everything
I realize that a heart with no words
Is a holy place to go to for pilgrimage
That all the words in every language
Become one single whisper of divinity.

When silence fills the room with its essence
I realize that I will fade away just like incense
That what covers my soul is not my presence
That the blocks of my ego is going to evanesce
That God is much more than a word that is written.

Prayers of a Candle

To burn you my candle
I've been waiting for years and years
And to have a spot of fire
I've dived in oceans of cheers, fears and tears.

Oh my candle
It's time to start burning
It's time to start turning
It's time to go back where you came from.

Burn my candle
And burn my desires
Burn up your wax
And put out my fires.

Burn up my candle
Put down my temple
Let out all these prayers I can't handle
I'm no more jailed in this tomb
It's time to fly back where I came from.

Burn up my candle
Explode the light stored in me
Let it shine through my every cell
Let my soul fly free.

Burn my candle and leave the evil
Don't think what you see around is true
Look inside, meditate a little
There lives the light that is you.

Just Leaves

Autumn, why do you shed your leaves
Under the passing wheels?
I can't handle the feelings you raise in me
I'm scared, how things in winter will be?!

At my desk there is nothing at all
I have no pen or ruler.
Measures, leaves and veils are fading away.
Imagine!
Even your leaves around the circle
Will fall… one day.

Autumn, you are my number zero
My start, my end
Me hero

For every leaf I shed a tear
For every leaf I raised a fear
By the end of years
I draw circles inside the dried roses.

My autumn
If the candles I lit for your nights
Were lies
Then, so do me
So are you
So is God…

A Scratch

My kingdom is here
No where
And I’m still the queen of questions
The mark that anything can remove
And there I put my ethereal crown
Where I can’t see
Where you don’t know
Keep on reading my books
And I’ll keep reading them my way
I’m still there
Don’t try to catch a wisp of light
Words are more meaningful
More silent
And darker than a braid
Of an ancient goddess
Who chose, to vehemently retire.

Ever thought why we’re so thrilled to look?
We’re always scared of extremes
When fancy is our only reality
I laugh, yet you’ve never realized
I’m wider than a momentary curve
That riddles the whim you don’t know about
But extraordinarily feel.
Let’s simply laugh
Sip what we have in our cups
Dip in the silence of overcrowded streets.

What’s wrong with an oriental woman
Wearing a lip ring?
What’s wrong with a goddess dispersed?
Inconsistent with passions, history and sheets?
I look at my thick mirror
And see nothing but a story telling a myth
Of an ancient goddess
Who carried fire and water in one hand
And created the world’s masterpieces
With the second
Within a second.

Shall we dance?
Music carries the capacity of creation
And creep with us to the core of passiveness
Where imagination, becomes a chewed theme.
I scratch the windows
To write my notes on the fog and send them
To an oriental goddess
Who would create me.

A Margin for a Nomad

I try to keep our basils green
But I am not a hero
And autumn has wrapped its’ shawl around us
And we will never have our coffee together.
You may not know that I don’t like coffee
But I can never forget that you said
It tastes like me
Tense but yet, sweet.
Now I know, coffee is not sweet
And so are your words.

I am not a hero
It’s meaningless to stand alone
When all the stories collapse
What’s our life without a story?
What would I say to my epithets?
Doctrines can’t give us love
Only principles can.

I am not myself anymore
Don’t remind me of my promises
My gushing passions
“Love itself is what’s left over
when being in love has burned away”*
I stand in the rows
Walk down all the ready made phrases
I prefer life beyond philosophies
And death… beyond sour words
But life is not you and I
And the rain writes its’ own poem
Where we are not.

We are two lost souls
Struggling to finish their last dance
While love sits in a dark corner
Waiting for the rain to fall
Wash our gestures
And give us a second chance
To be anyone, anything, but ourselves.

Nomads we will always be
Living in words
With nothing living inside of us
Nothing within
And our search will go on
Find your words and swords
And I’ll be looking for my home
A margin, where words can grow.

* Louise de Bernieres: Captin Corelli’s Mandolin.

Sing Me an Arabian Night

Sing to me an Arabian night
I’m trapped, trapped in history
Shahrazad, lost in despair
Playing with her Oud
Sewing words and times
Destiny loves notes played haphazardly
Clamorous tales of love
And severe words that rings a bell.

Sing me an Arabian night
A passion knows how to rise
Crash on the rocks of Sidon
And split the way back to Haifa
Jezebelknew how to itch the tides
Save testaments and rights
And cast spells with her glides
Upon the ancient kingdom.

Spare me an Arabian knight
For the word has been forsaken for years
Why did you come back?
Why did you bring Akbar to my bight?
He, who dropped the scepter for love,
Is my king
Listen to me, I am a Canaanite
“Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?”

Create me an Arabian night
I have a feigned, cautious dream
Brother, are your feet on the ground?
I’ve roamed the deserts and the illusions
Yet you think I am a refugee!
Give your expectations a time
You don’t want my nightmare
To ruin what you’re thinking to imagine.

There…

At the corner of my window
There is an overwhelming question
There is a word
There is a thought
And there are miles drawling on the edges.

There is the shadow of someone
Gestures that I know
Smell of laughter
Echoes of a vow.

There is some breeze flowing somewhere
A shadow I can't touch
A sense I can't hunch
An answer waiting for a question
A secret I love not to know!
There is unforgettable expression.

On my window
There are thousand stars
There is a pillow
There are some old Greek jars
There is a willow…

Identity…

Cracks are expanding deep in Earth and on the moon surface
Nothing in life seems to be complete
Nothing seems to understand what's behind the mask
Nothing seems to observe the taste of the flowing beat.

I left my wallet back home
I walked bare-footed in the empty streets
I rolled down the jasmine seeds
I breathed the bird's victories and retreats
And yet nothing seemed to be complete.

I left my identity on the dusty desk
Stored all the missing puzzles inside
Tried to catch a wandering risk
Circled around the clock looking for a number
All I found is a sub-man lost in a cave of slumber.

When the shadows of butterflies locked my tears away
I threw the rancor rings in that rusty closet
I stepped ahead toward the garden way
And beyond the horizon I planted a bay
There the North Star whispered a secret I can't betray.

On My Way to No Where…

On my way to no where
I stood wordless in the wood
I heard Adam wailing deprived from heaven
Beside my foot there was a lotus flower
That added to my journey an essential leaven.

Walking down the valley
My mother up the hill stood and called
Don't grow old
Don't grow old
Don't leave your child behind

Trees and masks
Faces I know and others yet I don't
Down the valley is my hidden book
There is the wave I can ride to the skies
Down is buried million stars
There is the cave of Mohammad
And the last supper of Christ
Away from all the rotten scripts
That's so smelly to be served in the present or even the past. 

Call me my sacred child
Light up the wisdom frozen in me
Give me a key to open the earth
A secret word to transcend the galaxy
A color to paint suns on the sky of the North Pole
A deck to see my tarot cards
Glance to the future of the past
Have a portrait of the present
An idea about a time I do not realize
A life time compromise
Inspire me the perfume of eternity.

Going to no where
I witness shooting stars falling
The entire universe calling
The tulip flowers growing on the edges of time
Going to no where
I hold a pencil in my hand
To draw a house in my empty space
To collect the heart I adore
For infinity is knocking on the door.

The star needs to fall…

I need more sight to inspire me the vision of future
A pen to draw my path to the unknown
A sense of art to paint blank gesture
I need real colors to draw half empty picture
I need a picture.

Two steps ahead there is nothing but fog
All I can see is a hand messing with my papers
A book that is closed is my everything
A picture I don't posses is my everything
Some ashes is a tray is all that is left
The smoke of a candle is where I belong.

Burning…
A suitable word to begin with
A suitable expression to build my dreams on
All is falling except the words hanging on my wall
The world seems to be a dusty ball
And I'm wasting the puzzle part and whole
The star needs to fall.

Because There Is No End…  

Blank books on the desk
Within the pages written a whole story
A life time streams
An undiscovered glory
Meanings without words
Over used expressions
Nothing is like the truth
Not enough languages to tell the dusty visions.

Starts without end
Life moves in circles
Mysterious start and unknown end
The way gracious clouds transcend
Peel the onion and accept
You are nothing
But an essential concept
Just accept
The burned stars
The useless words
The passing years
Ever unanswered questions
All the exceptions
Just try
For the chances are passing by
Roses are passing by
Mountains are passing by…

A countless second is the expression of time
Insight lights and disappears all at once
All the ignored things seems to be precious
A motionless pillow
Separate worlds
Old words
Zeros and heroes
Mind without thoughts
Wrecks of old hearts and boats
A stone from the depth of earth
Death and birth
All is a very special words endless life whisper.

Let Go

Following the pattern of the shapeless floors
I was guided to nowhere and everywhere
To endless gateless kingdoms
I was guided to one single full stop
To a wave of boundless top
I was guided to where I came from
To nothingness…

Following the shapeless shapes
Tossing my coins I got heads and tales
I hug the welcome goodbye
And let go

Let go

Let go

Till I reached the ending dots of the falling walls
That never existed…

What is Left

A period between the two stops
Where I heard a call
Where I found my identity
A word that is lost in between
Leave it unsaid
And leave the gates closed
And leave me
To grow with my words
Leave me away
Where there is nothing but noise
Where there is nothing but life
Where there is nothing but old dishes.

Vastness is where my heart lies
The endless universe is my home
Don’t engage me with the silent walls
I’m the whisper of the flowing souls
The unique expression of universe
I am the sacred word of God
That carries blessings to those who are dead
And those who are alive
I’m the flowers sacrificed to the sun
Don’t miss the way and run.

I’m no more few letters
Don’t call me
I’m no more a number
Don’t count me
I am no more a face
I don’t belong to your human race
Go and finish your battle
And drink children’s dreams with your dinner
Go wherever
Lead your cattle
And on your way you will meet a shepherd
Ask him about your name
Ask where the starts fall
Ask him to search what is left
And take it with you there
To the no where.